Good morning, good afternoon and good evening readers,

This morning I woke at 9am and went to go and have a shower. Ta da! The hot water was not working. Absolute classic. I would say I have spent a total of ten hours of my adult life trying to solve “The Mystery of the Broken Boiler”, but I am yet to reach the end of the saga.

Alas, the show must go on. Apparently cold water is good for your hair anyway.

I have spent the majority of the day publishing my blog, practicing CBT techniques and processing the last seven days. I would like to share some of my current challenges that cause the ever familiar anxiety buzz:

• I am not confident in going into a restaurant and asking for a table.
• I am not able to say “excuse me” on the bus in Armenian.
• I am not able to go into a shop and say “Kind shop assistant, do you sell Cumin?”

First world problems, hey.

I suppose I could ask if they speak English, or just point at things until they know what on earth I am going on about. However, I have an irrational mindset and in my mind, these are utterly plausible outcomes. They are as follows:

• The world could implode (obviously)
• I could internally combust (feasible)
• The shop assistant could turn around and kick me for my poor Armenian (plausible)

On reflection these outcomes seem slightly dubious, but at the time they feel very, very real.

I have compiled all of my greatest fears for this trip into “A Ladder of Fear”.

DUN, DUN, DUNNNNNNNNN

The plan is to focus on one fear a week and conquer the hell out of it. I suppose if I internally combust or the world implodes, I won’t remember a thing any way. But if someone kicks me I shall not be impressed, let me tell you that.

Four hours later….

LADIES AND GENTLEMAN, ARMENIANS AND ENGLISH,
THE AWARD FOR SAYING “GANGAREM GAGARNEK” ON THE BUS GOES TO….

*Drum roll please*

CHARLOTTE BOYLE

*The crowd goes wiiiiiiiiiiiild”

Ch’yeah I said. I don’t know why you lot made such a big deal out of it any way.

In kindness,
C X